I'm so tired.
Of being tired.
I wish it would get better!
And it always does, when I get to the middle of the day.
But the mornings are just so damn hard to slug through.
Perhaps I need to adjust my bedtime schedule.
I go to sleep quite late. It may be hindering how I feel in the morning :/
Thursday, February 16, 2017
Thursday, February 2, 2017
On Friendship: Part IV Part II
The Case of Charlie Gordon
Flowers for Algernon is a curious, subtle, yet powerful
book. The novel follows the life of Charlie Gordon, a 32-year-old man born with
an unusually low IQ who undergoes a "smart" operation.
![]() |
| Charlie and Algernon |
There's a passage in the book which I was particularly
struck by. It goes like this:
"You've become cynical," said Nemur. "That's
all this opportunity has meant to you. Your genius has destroyed your faith in
the world and in your fellow men."
"That's not completely true," I [Charlie Gordon]
said softly. "But I've learned that intelligence alone doesn't mean a
damned thing. Here in your university, intelligence, education, knowledge, have
all become great idols. But I know now there's one thing you've all overlooked:
intelligence and education that hasn't been tempered by human affection isn't
worth a damn."
I helped myself to another martini from the nearby sideboard
and continued my sermon.
"Don't misunderstand me," I said.
"Intelligence is one of the greatest human gifts. But all too often a
search for knowledge drives out the search for love. This is something else
I've discovered for myself very recently. I present it to you as a hypothesis:
Intelligence without the ability to give and receive affection leads to mental
and moral breakdown, to neurosis, and possibly even psychosis. And I say that
the mind absorbed in and involved in itself as a self-centered end, to the
exclusion of human relationships, can only lead to violence and pain.
"When I was retarded I had lots of friends. Now I have
no one. Oh, I know lots of people. Lots and lots of people. But I don't have
any real friends. Not like I used to have in the bakery. Not a friend in the
world who means anything to me, and no one I mean anything to." I
discovered that my speech was becoming slurred, and there was a lightness in my
head. "That can't be right, can it?" I insisted. "I mean, what
do you think? Do you think that's... that's right?"
The scene goes on in dramatic fashion - I encourage you all
to read the whole book. It's great. I mean, it's really great.
But entirety of the book aside, I find the life of Charlie
Gordon much akin to our lives.
We often think that when we are able to master/become good
at ABC, that we will be praised, loved, adored. (Make lots of friends) Yet,
when reality hits, and you find that people are more often than not, selfish,
envious, jealous of success (not hard to find this out, just look in the
mirror) and the praise you so longed for isn't there, we collapse in sorrow.
![]() |
| What do you see? |
My point being: Friends are hard to come by. Friends that
give a damn. Friends who mean something to you, and who you mean something to
them. Friends who acknowledge suffering as a part of life - who don't see your vulnerability
or grief as a weakness, but as an unmistakable aspect of life. Friends who are
genuinely happy to see you succeed.
I mention sharing struggles, because that's become so rare
in society nowadays. Social media is imperfect in its mediocre ability to
minister to those who are hurting. So much of social media is about constructing this
perfect, totally superficial, image, only filled with happiness and devoid of any actual substance.*
Can you find it in yourself to share? To take that first
step and open up to others? In full knowledge of the fact that others have hurt
you in the past? Admitting that we ourselves have hurt others as well? Can you
find it in yourself to empathize with your fellow brother/sister when they're
hurting? Not just give them advice, but to cry with them? Share and empathize,
fearless of judgment/scrutiny?
Love,
- Jinwoo
"To love at all is to be vulnerable."
- C.S. Lewis
*Please forgive my railing against social media. It's just there's undeniably been a lot of harm that has come from such advancements in technology. I am, undoubtedly, guilty in these matters as well, so what I say should be taken with a grain of salt.
Sunday, January 29, 2017
On Friendship: Part IV
To Zend: A poem about our relationship
I had a friend
His name was Zend.
I told him to fend
for himself and thend
our friendship was rend
to a complete end.
To go back and mend
a letter I could send
but I'd have to bend
over backwards. That, I don't intend.
Oh Zend
Why didn't you contend
and dis-recommend
our end?
If only my penned
letter could extend
you my hend.
I depend
on you, Zend.
No more pretend.
Can I come over next weekend?
No? I am offend-
dend.
Sunday, January 22, 2017
On Friendship: Part III
Greg and I met in the fall, around September of 2016.
Our first encounter, we laughed about two completely different things - I can't remember what it was, but both our laughs were hearty and boisterous, and that was more than enough to spark our odd kinship.
I talk a lot about influence, and wonder how much someone or something has an impact on our lives. And I can honestly say Greg has made a lasting difference in my life. When I arrived in Ann Arbor, Greg was one of the first people who reached out to me and who I shared life with. His listening ear, honest advice, and practical perspective, I found touching.
I remember distinctly, Greg telling me, "I admire how consistent you are with your blog."
His compliment revitalized my blog-tired spirit; almost no one had told me I was tenacious (because most of my life I have not been) and it motivated me to continue the blog, weekly, no matter what. I promised myself that I would make at least one post come Sunday each week. (I'm crossing my fingers right now)
So really, the only reason I continue to write this blog is because of Greg. Thanks Greg, for cursing (blessing?) the public with my weekly tirades/writing/discourse.
I have long enjoyed your friendship, candor, and humor, brother.
I'll miss you, and I wish you the best of luck in Korea,
Love,
- Jinwoo
![]() |
| Greg. |
I talk a lot about influence, and wonder how much someone or something has an impact on our lives. And I can honestly say Greg has made a lasting difference in my life. When I arrived in Ann Arbor, Greg was one of the first people who reached out to me and who I shared life with. His listening ear, honest advice, and practical perspective, I found touching.
I remember distinctly, Greg telling me, "I admire how consistent you are with your blog."
![]() |
| "I admire how consistent you are with your blog." |
So really, the only reason I continue to write this blog is because of Greg. Thanks Greg, for cursing (blessing?) the public with my weekly tirades/writing/discourse.
I have long enjoyed your friendship, candor, and humor, brother.
![]() |
| Greg Monroe watching elections. |
Love,
- Jinwoo
Sunday, January 15, 2017
Sunday, January 8, 2017
On Friendship: Part I
My good friend and I were talking about how the nature of relationships were changing hand in hand with the advent of advanced technology.
Our mobile phones, the internet, and some other third thing gives us access to most, if not all, our perceived desires. Everything we need is at our fingertips.
![]() |
| Search: Dank Memes. |
And we began our talk about how consumable everything was becoming in our culture. From humor, (memes) to sex (tinder).
I began to wonder afterwards at the current mindset of our generation. At the risk of sounding apocalyptic, I saw this kind of consumables-mindset carry over into our broader understanding of friendships in general too.
When a person is angry or has opposing views with a friend, they "*unfriend" them - it's no longer necessary to talk out the issue with them respectfully and cordially. Why bother? Friends can be made with a click of a button.
![]() |
| Zuckerberg? |
This kind of view of friendships and relationships in a broader aspect can, not only cause a lot of harm, but leads people astray from the true meaning of deep, lasting relationships.
And I understand maybe that's not what some people are or should be looking for all the time. I'm not looking for deep, personal conversations or an intimate relationship with the guy who delivers my pizza. Nothing against pizza guys, but my point is that for those few people you want to share more of yourself with, to treat them in a dismissive way would be counterproductive to developing kinship.
![]() |
| Pizza is love, pizza is life. |
But alas, more questions arise:
Who can you trust? Who can you share with? How much? What exactly do you share?
Stay warm!
See you guys next week.
- Jinwoo
*The quotations are a reference to Facebook, which has effectively destroyed the meaning of the very word, 'friend'. (I am not a fan of facebook, as you guys could probably tell)
Sunday, January 1, 2017
New Year
Looking forward to writing about different topics this upcoming year for y'all. Planning on starting these blogs a little before the day of from now on. (Surprise lol)
I have to go to sleep now.
xoxo,
- J Slice
I have to go to sleep now.
| How did I get here? |
- J Slice
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